It's been a year ago, today. Sometimes it feels like an eternity, with so many memories and so many tears shed. It's been an extremely difficult time for my husband; the passing of his mother that he was so close to. They had a wonderful relationship. But, I can remember every tiny little detail about her last day, as if it were yesterday. And, I imagine that day will always stay with me.
Dawn Shores was a phenomenal woman. A person like no one else I've ever met in my life. My daughters are having an incredibly difficult time this anniversary. Dawn will always be in our hearts.
So, I am reposting the blog I wrote last year, the day after her passing, to keep her close in our thoughts.
She Died Yesterday, The Day Her First Great Grandbaby Was Due
My husband's mother lost her battle with cancer yesterday. We got the call at 4:30 to come immediately as it would only be a matter of time. We walked into her apartment 5 minutes too late. Her sister Joan and niece, Debbie were with her when she passed away. My teenage daughters were devastated.
Dawn was one of the most courageous women I had ever met. She was diagnosed almost four years ago. She had a pea sized lump on her lung. In time it grew and became the size of a grapefruit. She had the slow growing cancer, squamous cell cancer. As time progressed the cancer began wrapping itself around her heart and her left lung. Her lungs began filling up with fluid, so she had to have one drained twice a week. Doctors feared that her heart would give out because of the strain. The cancer took it's toll on her body. She went from 135 lbs down to less than 90 lbs. She was fragile and frail.
She wouldn't let you say the word 'cancer' around her. She was in complete denial. And that's why she lived so long beyond her initial diagnosis. Everytime she went to the doctor they marveled that she was still alive.
Every new ache or pain was not because of the cancer. She would say, "I don't know why they can't figure out why this hurts so much. I've been telling the doctor for 8 months there's something wrong with it, but they just can't figure it out."
Dawn got out of bed eveyday and was insistent on getting dressed. She wanted to be ready to go out for a bite to eat or to head to the store (just in case). She put makeup on everyday, until the last week and a half. The chemo took her hair, and as it began growing back, when we went to her apartment to see her, she had to grab her wig or a hat before she let us come in. She apologized profusely for not wearing any makeup. "Oh, I must look awful today," she'd say.
She died when my husband was out of town on a business trip - and that was his biggest fear. Should I go? he asked. I couldn't make that decision for him, I would support him one way or another. His mother had been diagnosed 4 years ago. She looked good when he left. The prognosis was good. His trip got pushed back a day, and then a week. There were family members that devoted their days, weeks, months and the last couple of years to her, including my husband. So, someone was always with her. Hospice was there too, and they were absolutely incredible.
She wouldn't discuss final arrangements. In her mind if she did, she was giving into the cancer.
Dawn Shores was a phenomenal person and an incredible grandmother. Her husband died when her boys were 5 and 7 years old. She raised her two boys by herself, working two jobs. No grass ever grew under her feet. She had an infectious personality, she was a very active member of the community, and she was always out, staying busy. She never missed a ball game, a wrestling match, a school play. She was an active part of her grandchildren's lives. She was at all of their dance shows, school plays, powerlifting meets, birthday parties. If her grandkids were in it, she was there.
She was feisty and funny. She had a great sense of humor. And, she was so incredibly inquisitive about everything in your life, no matter who you were. She was interested in everyone and was a great listener. When my daughters went to see her she would ask them 30 questions about school, boys, sports, dance, you name it. She loved them dearly and said her biggest regret was that she wouldn't be alive to see them grow to have families of their own.
Dawn's first great grandbaby girl, April, was due yesterday, March 5, 2009, the day she died. Everyday she would ask what day it was and wasn't that baby due on the 5th? She knew.
Dawn Shores, 45 year resident of Melbourne Florida died at 74 years old. Dawn was my husband's mother and the only father he ever knew, ( as his dad died when he was 5 years old).
She was one of the "good ones". It makes no sense to us why she was chosen to leave us at such a young age. We have learned so much from her. We will miss her dearly, but we know that she fought with all that she had in her. Now, it's time for her to lay her head down and finally rest, as it has been such a painful struggle for her.
God bless you, Dawn, and thank you for everything that you have given everyone whose life you have touched.
Sandy Shores REALTOR®, Melbourne/Palm Bay FL Real Estate
Brevard County, Florida's Space Coast Real Estate & Investing
I specialize in Residential, Investment & Relocations.
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that for you




Always a difficult one when someones mother passes.
Thanks for posting this and letting us know about Dawn.
I was once told that something special happens to the spirit of someone each time you think about them.
Sandy - Dawn is now in Haven. Sorry to hear about your loss.
John
Sandy, how strange we have a common link. My Dad's passing was on March 5th, 2005. Simply writing that brings a tear to my eye. I can empathize and sympathize too!
Sandy sorry about your loss. Cancer is not an easy way to go. I worked for years in the health care industry and have a very good idea of what Dawn and your family went through. Take some time of with your husband and children.
Sandy, I am so sorry about this loss. You wrote a beautiful tribute to a wonderful woman and these days are never easy to get through. I always try to remember all the fun times on these very difficult days and that's what seems to get me through them....thinking of you and your family.
Sandy - I remember when you first spoke of Dawn's passing! It's difficult to believe it was a year ago. I am hopeful the pain of losing her has lessened to some degree, and it's easier to savor the wonderful times you shared with her!
Sandy
Your story in very touching.
Good luck and success.
Lou Ludwig
Sandy, my best to you and your husband on this sad anniversary. Very touching post, thanks for sharing it.
Sandy, she sounds like an incredible and lovely lady! God had a plan for her....may she rest in peace! God bless your family!
Sandy-so sorry about your mother in law. What a wonderful tribute you wrote. My husband lost his father last year to cancer also and we will be coming up on the one year anniversary and his mother is such a trooper. What a terrific person she sounds like Sandy. You did her justice!
Hi Sandy, It's hard to believe that a year has already gone by. These anniversaries are hard, and sometimes it just seems like yesterday. I know she will always be in your hearts and her memory will guide you through your days. Love to you and your family Sandy!
Sandy, what a beautiful tribute you wrote and what wonderful memories you must have to remember her by. All the best to you and your family.
Hello, Sandy. This is so very beautiful- you have written a lovely memorial to what was surely a lovely lady. I know that time doesn't really heal the loss of someone so dearly loved. My dad passed away 8 years ago last month, and I still miss him and think of him every single day. God bless you all.
Debi
Ralph, Thanks for the well wishes. Wow, if it's true that something happens to someone's spirit each time someone thinks about them, then she has truly been blessed, because she is thought of all the time. Thanks for the smile!
John, Thank you, we take comfort in that.
Kevin, Oh my goodness...not a surprise to me that we had some kind of link, but such an unfortunate one. I am so sorry to hear of your father's passing. It must be so incredibly difficult for you. It was certainly not my intention to make you cry. God bless - you are in my thoughts.
John, Oh boy, so having worked in the industry, you must be very familiar with cancer patients. That must have been an incredibly difficult job for you! I don't think I could do it.
Carole, Thanks so much. And thanks for the reminder to remember the fun times. Dawn had such an great laugh. I try to remember all the times we headed to all the theme parks and she would ride all the rollercoasters with my girls. She was incredible. I found it so hard to write this last year, as I felt like I just wasn't doing her justice. Words didn't seem as if they were enough.
Myrl, Time has certainly passed quickly. We know that it was best for Dawn to pass when she did, as she was just beginning to feel the terrible pain of the cancer. She was only in the hospital a couple of times and had only 1 day where she was bedridden. So we consider it a blessing that she passed when she did, as we know so many that have suffered so much more than she did.
Lou, Thanks. She was a wonderful woman.
Gabe, She was a person that touched all who she met. She was wonderful.
Caren, I agree with you, God did have a plan for her.
Debra, I'm so sorry to hear about your father in law. That's terrible. It's never easy, is it. Take care of yourselves and it's wonderful that your mother in law is being strong during these tough times. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
Thank you so much Miss Mary, These times are tough. And I know that it's been tough for you also. Hang in there. And my love right back to you and yours!
Silvia, Thank you so much. She was such an easy person to love, thus it was easy to write about her. She was wonderful. Thank you for the well wishes.
Debi, Time marches on, but it never really heals the wounds, does it? I'm sorry about your father. And I know that you must miss him terribly. The loss of a parent is tragic. My grandmother passed 28 years ago. I still talk to her, think of her all the time and miss her dearly.
Sandy,
Dawn is sitting in heaven smiling down at you....
Hugs to you my friend!
Ann Hayden in Wildwood, MO